It is raining outside today.
I love summer and autumn rains to the point that I've danced around in them before. Arms spread, face tilted to the sky as rainfall cooled my skin and wind played in my hair. I'm not even joking. Don't worry, I kept my shoes on.
I dare you to try it. Just don't get struck by lightning.
The only thing about autumn rain is that it usually brings lower temperatures with it and at the moment I don't have any coats, jackets or boots. Between leaving Alabama and returning to Mississippi, an entire box of my belongings have been playing hide and seek. Those belongings included all of my cold weather clothes.
Yes, even the South has winter. Barely. Sometimes.
What does any of this have to do with writing?
Nothing. Nothing at all.
I just couldn't think of any better way to start this blog post, which is about the trouble with writing first lines. Or rather, the trouble with writing, period.
So, I've officially planned to begin writing my dystopian sci-fi/fantasy novel, tentatively titled "Chaos & Illusion," at the start of 2014 and the plan is to have a first draft complete or halfway complete by December 2014.
I have been brainstorming and putting together things for this story since my senior year at university, and it has evolved a lot. I feel like it is almost time to begin the story, and the main character is really starting to develop at a rapid pace.
The problem is, every time I look at a blank page, whether it be writing by hand or on the computer, I go cross-eyed.
I've written a beginning before, but it is too passive. She's sitting on a roof, looking at the sky, hinting to the reader that there is something not quite normal about the world she inhabits.
And then what?
Well...that's the problem. Nothing is actually happening. No conflict. No other characters. Just navel-gazing.
I'm trying my best not to fall into that trap of passive writing again, and I know that a good opening is never passive. My writing professor at my alma mater once described it as "spoon-feeding" the reader.
Writing looks so easy when the book is complete, bound, and shipped off with pretty cover art, but it isn't easy at all. I'm betting that most published books have a history behind it that probably involved the author banging their head against a desk at some point.
Writing a book, be it a short story or book one in a trilogy, is not for the weak. It can be enjoyable, but it also can be daunting, frustrating and filled with emotional turmoil before even a single sentence is written.
Why can't the scenes in my head become perfect words on the page as soon as I dream them up?
Why can't I write more than 100 words a time on this project?
Where is this story going?
Are my characters realistic?
Does this suck?
Am I a terrible writer?!
Maybe I'll just go and watch another episode of that show on Netflix.
I should be halfway done with this by now and I'm only on chapter one?!
I should just quit while I'm ahead.
No, I can do this.
Can I do this?
Why is this so haaaaaard?
Why am I doing this to myself?
Because I love it. Because I have a story to tell.
Sometimes my writing sessions are a breeze and I can go on for hours. Sometimes a one-hour session results in only 400 words that made getting a cavity filled seem more inviting.
If you're like me, when you sit down to write, you're battling your ambition, your doubt, your attention span, and life's distractions.
Here's to hoping I get out of my own way. Because nobody is going to tell this story for me.
I like where you went with that first paragraph and leading into the difficulty of writing those first few lines. As a younger writer, I proclaimed with all the authority of a learned fourteen-year-old that beginnings were always bad. Since then, I've learned I know nothing except beginnings were not always bad but certainly terrible to write.
ReplyDeleteYour description of writing the main character beginning the story passively, with most of the "action" being in her thoughts, is something I still struggle with too. As writers, we're so fascinated with our characters. Character studies are intricate, exciting writing practices -- for no one except us, as you noted. Indeed.
Spot on about each paragraph, especially one that's kept, is a battlefield. If the author wins, the paragraph stays. But we have a sinister enemy of incredible force at hand, called many names, and in The Neverending Story, they know this as The Nothing.
"I've got....nothing," says the writer after a half-hour's non-work.
This brings me right back to what I told you earlier. Yesterday, all I could write was "The empty plate." Today, I go back, scratch it out, and add details -- the plate technically wasn't empty, because it held details that led to a question which caused a strong reaction. No such luck yesterday or the day before.
Good post! I like how open you are about your journey as a writer~!
Funny since I totally was like "I have no idea what I'm even writing about" in this post.
ReplyDeleteThanks madam! Yes, I related to that plate thing so well. It can be so frustrating! I just don't want C&I to be part of the morgue of unfinished stories haha. I think it is a great story that deserves to be laid out on the page. If only I can get out of my own head.